PICK UP LINES
WHAT PICK UP LINES?
- (leaning over to whisper) I think about you when I masturbate.
- Are we related? Do you want to be?
- Can you say Constantinople backwards? Me neither, but I just wanted to ask.
- Can you spell ICUP. I-C-U-P.
- You saw me pee. (laugh profusely)
- Do you know how to use a whip?
- Drop ‘em!
- Excuse me, do you live around here often?
- Excuse me, I am about to go masturbate and needed a name to go with the face.
- Hey babe…can you suck a golf ball through 50 feet of garden hose?
- Hey babe…can you suck start a Harley?
- Hi, I just wanted to give you the satisfaction of turning me down; go ahead say no.
- Hold out two fingers and say: "Why should a woman masturbate with these two fingers?" (I don’t know.) "’Cause they’re mine sweetheart."
- I am very, very lonely, and I was wonderin’…
- I know a great way to burn off the calories in that pastry you just ate. I’m drunk.
- I’m not trying anything, I always put my hands there.
- I’m on fire. Can I run through your sprinkler?
- If I could be anything, I’d love to be your bathwater. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put you between F and CK
- Like the look of your crotch.
- Pardon me but I was just about to go home and masturbate and I was wondering if you’d mind if I fantasize about you?
- Pardon me miss, but I help noticing that you have cum in your hair.
- Really like your peaches, wanna shake your tree.
- Say, did we go to different schools together?
- That outfit must make a lot of noise in the dryer, huh.
- What’s a slut like you doing in a classy joint like this??
- Why you’ve got the whitest teeth I’d ever want to cum across!
- Would you like Gin and platonic or do you prefer Scotch and sofa?
- Would you like to dance or should I go fuck myself again?
- Would you like to see me naked ??
- Wow! Are you really as beautiful as you seem or do you remind me of myself?
- You are just truly absolutely beautiful! Can you cook and clean also?
- You are so fine that I’d eat your shit just to see where it came from.
- You got nice breasts, but what color are your nipples? Brown or Pink?
- You know what I like about you? My arms.
- You know, I’d really love to fuck your brains out, but it appears someone beat me to it.
- You know, my mother says you have the smoothest complexion of anyone she knows.
- You look just like my mother.
- You look like a hooker I knew in Fresno.
- You remind me of a girl I used to date.
- You remind me of my dead ex-girlfriend.
- You’re ‘No Parking’ right? Just trying to guess your sign.
- Your name is Laura, huh? Can I call you Laura? Really, what time?
- Are my undies showing? Answer: "No." You: "Would you like them to?
- I’d walk a million miles over broken glass just to meet the guy that fucked you last.
- If you were a booger I’d pick you first.
- Excuse me , she says "Uh huh", do you have any Grey Poupon? no? well we can still get the sandwich action going on baby….
- hey baby, can i feel your Ginsana? (No.) Wanna feel mine?
- Do you like clocks? (Yes.) Put two hands and a face on this. (Point down)
- Do you like chocolate? (Yes.) You can have my bar.
- Beer is the root of all evil. Give me a beer. I’m a WICKED root!
- Hey baby… you got any diseases? Want some?
- I’m an iceberg on a summer’s day in South Carolina.
- Is your name daisy? Because I have a sudden urge to plant you right here!!!
- Pardon me, do you mind if I push in your stool?
- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would flip the M and W (double you).
- If belly buttons were a status symbol, then baby you would be God.
- Have you ever seen a tree branch? [Girl] Yes. [Guy] How about a root?
- I have four words for you "Hol I Day Inn".
- I am not a queen but I’ll give you something royal.
- Is your name Brandy? Because your the best liqueur I have ever had.
- Does an elephant taking a shit make you want to fuck everything around you?
- Do you want a worm-do? (Whats a worm do?) It does this..(Move your finger like a worm~~~~~~)
- I’d call this puppy love but I’m not into all those new positions.
- Wow, your eyebrows are thick.
- I’m sick. My medicine is to talk to you.
- I’m feeling a little off today. Would you like to turn me on?
- Are you an Emerson? Because those are some nice tits!
- You’re like a Pringle. Once I pop ya, I can’t stop ya.
- Your hair is so soft. Do you use Paul Mitchell products?
- You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
- I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?
- (if your name is Dan) Did you know my name backwards is "Nad"?
- Hey baby, I think you made my two by four into a four by eight.
- I’m not actually this tall. I’m sitting on my wallet.
- Have you ever heard of the naked pretzel? Ok, sit on my magical lap and we’ll see what rises!
- Do you have the time? [Gives the time] No, the time to write down my number?
- Buy me a beer, will ya hon?
- You look like my mommy. I like my mommy.
- What the hell are you looking at? (go up to a table and whip it out)
[TO BE CONTINUED LATER]
